A Recount of the events since 2nd
October 2006
This is an update on what happened at Danny’s funeral and the days
just before that. It will take us time to write down every detail of what we have
been through since the diagnosis of Danny’s condition but we will do that in the days to come.
Daniel celebrated his 8th birthday on the 2nd of October at Hospital. Because
of his condition where he couldn’t be left alone we were not able to do much for his birthday. However the staff at the hospital and the patients, parents in the ward supplied a cake and put up balloons
and decorations. The family were there to celebrate, including his cousins. At this stage Danny lay in bed being fed by a nasal tube. He was unable
to blink his eyes or move any part of his body voluntarily. He had been unable to
speak to us since August and had no way of really communicating with us. That night
for the first time Daniel called out ‘Mum’ and I was able to hold his hand and be with him. He was under constant prayer and at night Christopher would play the guitar and sing all his favourite songs
and choruses to him. He continued to stay stable medically. He seemed to improve over the next two days where we had no emergencies and he was coping well.
On the night of 4th Oct he seemed to have trouble swallowing (as
had happened in earlier emergencies) and they tried to help suction his throat to clear the fluid build-up. As a consequence of this vital air to his lungs is also suctioned out. His
pulse rate dropped and the nurses called in the emergency team who then suctioned him and started to draw the contents of
his stomach out as well. When they stopped I went back to Daniel and held him at his
head side and said to him ‘baby, breathe for mummy’ and his pulse rate immediately went up into the high 90’s. I told him we were with him and he is to do whatever he could do…the doctors were
only trying to help him. The emergency team again took over and tried to suction him. They sent us out of the room to take an x-ray as they feared his organs were failing. At this stage I was distraught. Chris was being
advised to give him morphine and to end it quickly. Chris couldn’t bring himself
to do that to Danny. When they allowed us back into the room we were told he was dying. They removed the monitors and left us with him. He
was breathing very softly and slowly.
At this time we called for family members to be with us and to pray. It was at this time the Lord showed me a glimpse of what was happening in the realm I couldn’t
see. I saw in front of me an angel of the Lord with his arms stretched out holding
back the clouds making it appear like a cloud tunnel. There appeared to be many angels
lining the tunnel but my focus was on the angel at the top. I was looking at his face
which I could see very clearly before me and I didn’t notice anything else. Suddenly
the angel’s head turned and his gaze was down the tunnel. I then saw the back
of Daniel. He was running the way he does. He
had a funny run and he was running up the tunnel. As I watched, at the top of the
clouds there was an area of green grass and I could see Jesus bending down with His arms outstretched towards Daniel. And Daniel ran straight into His arms without looking at anything else and as His arms
enveloped Daniel the vision just vanished. The words that were spoken so clearly at
that time were, ‘Daniel was not left alone for one second, the angels of God were with him all the time’. The names Peter and John were there to welcome him and also Aunty Jenny (an Aunt who had
recently passed away).
When I was once again aware of the hospital surroundings I looked at Danny
and I said to Chris ‘he’s gone, he’s not here, that’s just his shell’. In my heart I felt this immense joy that I wanted to laugh. All I could
see on the bed was like a piece of cloth rolled up, it wasn’t my son. The joy
was so real but it was hard to explain to those around me. I just knew Danny had made
it home. At this stage the medical staff came back into the room and clinically certified
his death. I went out into the corridor and found the nurses crying. I was able to comfort them. The head nurse was also in tears. Just days before the head nurse had called me into her office and asked me what if Daniel passed away, would
I be able to deal with it. All I heard myself saying at the time was ‘the grace
of God’. That’s how our conversation ended. I never understood at the time what I had said. When she stood before
me now and said ‘how are you’ I again spoke and heard myself say ‘remember the meeting in your office where
I said ‘the grace of God’? God always has a back up plan. Daniel is in
the best place and he is so happy’. The nurses then tended to Danny. My heart was full of praise to God for His mercy and grace. I
felt no connection to the body because I knew I would see him again.
While making funeral plans the Lord placed in my heart to not let the people
look down as the coffin was being lowered. I felt to get balloons which could be released
at that time. Also I felt to have sign writing done in the sky. Due to the cost the idea was being discouraged by near and dear ones. But
for my sake they rang up and got the person who covers the whole of Sydney
for sky-writing. He was more than happy to do it and gave us a discount as well. So, while his coffin was being lowered, the words I’M HOME WITH JESUS were written
in the sky which made everyone look heavenward at that time.
Everytime I went to view the body before the funeral, I was more and more
convinced that Danny wasn’t there, he was in Heaven. We did pray for a miracle
that he would rise from the dead. There was every possibility of that happening and
we believed it wholeheartedly. (The Lord spoke to me on the weekend on Saturday. We went home and I wanted to watch videos of him. It
became overwhelming so I opened up my Bible. I read from II Corinth 4:18 “while we look not at the things that are seen but at the things that are not
seen. For the things that are seen are temporal but the things that are not seen are eternal”. And again clearly the
Lord spoke ‘Danny made a choice’).
There were many people at the funeral, including all his primary school teachers,
my workmates, family and family friends, hospital staff, etc. We wanted a celebration
of his life. The children dressed up for a celebration. Pastor Ray McMartin presided over the service and spoke of Salvation at the gravesite because we wanted his
life to be used as a testimony to others who are lost. I believe that the Lord has
truly borne our grief and sorrows because we do miss Danny but we haven’t had the depths of grief and sorrow that many
people have expected us to experience.
Many times when I start to feel down the Lord reminds me that I am going
to see him and that He is coming soon and that I should be about His business. And
this settles my heart. When we worship the Lord we do not feel the loss of Daniel. If anything it has brought Heaven so close to us and the fear of death does not exist at
all. In fact death is more like a step we take to enter our true home.
The Lord is still ministering to us and carries us through. Daniel’s death has opened doors for us where people talk to us about eternal things and we’ve been
able to share the gospel. His life still continues to impact others for the Kingdom. The more we tell it the more the joy of the Lord fills our hearts and spurs us on to do
His Will. It has changed our focus in life forever.
Daniel gave his heart to the Lord in Sunday School. He was very sure of his decision. He played the guitar and the drums
on the stage at church with no formal training. He wanted to drive the Church bus
(just like his dad) and lead the worship in Church. He was allowed to conduct Sunday
School once because of his eagerness to do it. He preached many messages which he
waited on the Lord for. He composed his own songs for the Lord which he loved to sing
and record. His joy was to be in church early to set up all the instruments. He lived
a very focussed life. There was nothing he couldn’t do enough of if it was for
the Church and ministry. He told many of his friends about Jesus, right from Pre-school
upto year 2. He was never ashamed to tell others about Jesus. His life was fast-paced and full. He appeared to live 80 full years
in a span of 8 and was asked many times to slow down. His school friends are still
coming to terms with the loss of Daniel. The school is laying a memorial stone in
Daniel’s memory which should be completed in the new year. He has impacted a
lot of lives. From what I saw he received his biggest birthday party being welcomed
into Heaven.
The Lord is still miraculously keeping us and through this has given us a
platform of ministry through which we are able to touch many, many lives. We have
realised there are so many people hurting and grieving and are unable to cope with daily life.
The Lord has blessed us to see that what we have experienced is the normal transition from this earthly life to our
eternal home and what lies ahead. Because Jesus has borne our grief on the cross we
are able to live and not feel the impact of death. We know that death is just a shadow,
it is not defeat but victory to a believer.
Pastor Chris Fernandez, Susan and Grace.
30 January 2007
